 Aussie Humour
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Joined: Jun 2009
Posts: 3,995 Likes: 10
Loquacious
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OP
Loquacious
Joined: Jun 2009
Posts: 3,995 Likes: 10 |
A bloke's wife goes missing while diving off the West Australian Coast ....
He reports the event, searches fruitlessly and spends a terrible night wondering what could have happened to her.
Next morning there's a knock at the door and he is confronted by a couple of police officers, the old Sarge and a younger Constable.
The Sarge says, Mate, we have some news for you, unfortunately some really bad news, but, some good news, and maybe some more good news.
Well, says the bloke, I guess I'd better have the bad news first.
The Sarge says, I'm really sorry mate, but your wife is dead. Young Bill here found her lying at about five fathoms in a little cleft in the reef. He got a line around her and we pulled her up, but she was dead.
The bloke is naturally distressed to hear of this and has a bit of a turn.
But after a few minutes he pulls himself together and asks what the good news is.
The Sarge says, Well when we got your wife up there were quite a few really good sized lobsters and a swag of nice crabs attached to her, so we've brought you your share.
He hands the bloke a bag with a couple of nice lobsters and four or five crabs in it.
Geez thanks. They're bloody beauties. I guess it's an ill wind and all that... So, what's the other possible good news?
Well, the Sarge says, If you fancy a quick trip, young Bill and I get off duty at around 11 o'clock and we're gonna shoot over there and pull her up again.
P.S. Don't blame me, an American friend sent me this!
Dinosaur.
"Oh Man I only ride 'em.I don't know what makes 'em work". Donald "Oddball" Sutherland
"Don't let the bastards get you down". Kris Kristofferson
"I am only paranoid because everyone is against me". Larry [Frank Burns] Linville
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Re: Aussie Humour
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Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 2,419
Oil Expert
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Oil Expert
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 2,419 |
 that's a beaut! And it's also true about lobsters all over a corpse in the sea - happened to my uncle when I was lad.
Cheers, Richard
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09 America, Staintune Pipes, K&N, Breathe, Hagon Nitros, AI & O2 removed, tune 20184 (modified), MTX-L a/f gauge
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Re: Aussie Humour
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Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 3,286 Likes: 65
Loquacious
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Loquacious
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 3,286 Likes: 65 |
Quote:
that's a beaut! And it's also true about lobsters all over a corpse in the sea - happened to my uncle when I was lad.
How many did he catch?
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Re: Aussie Humour
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Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 2,419
Oil Expert
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Oil Expert
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 2,419 |
My dad was involved in the search for the body (I was only a nipper) but he caught enough to put my dad, who loved seafood, off lobster for life.
Last edited by foglefar; 04/17/2014 9:23 AM.
Cheers, Richard
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09 America, Staintune Pipes, K&N, Breathe, Hagon Nitros, AI & O2 removed, tune 20184 (modified), MTX-L a/f gauge
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Re: Aussie Humour
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Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 8,393 Likes: 1
Second Wind
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Second Wind
Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 8,393 Likes: 1 |
Wow.
any scavenger/ predator will eat a human as well as anything else. They don't know and don't care about our rules.
I have no faith in human perfectability. I think that human exertion will have no appreciable effect upon humanity. Man is now only more active - not more happy - nor more wise, than he was 6000 years ago.
Edgar Allan Poe
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Re: Aussie Humour
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Joined: Jun 2009
Posts: 3,995 Likes: 10
Loquacious
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OP
Loquacious
Joined: Jun 2009
Posts: 3,995 Likes: 10 |
That's why they use a bit of meat in crab/lobster pots as bait.
Dinosaur.
"Oh Man I only ride 'em.I don't know what makes 'em work". Donald "Oddball" Sutherland
"Don't let the bastards get you down". Kris Kristofferson
"I am only paranoid because everyone is against me". Larry [Frank Burns] Linville
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Re: Aussie Humour
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Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 6,060 Likes: 6
Worn Saddle
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Worn Saddle
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 6,060 Likes: 6 |
Ohhhh, that's HORRIBLE! And I laughed a lot!
Fidelis et Fortis
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Re: Aussie Humour
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Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 2,419
Oil Expert
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Oil Expert
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 2,419 |
When I think about it, It's really a double standard. We think nothing of eating them but get grossed out (and sometimes outraged) when our prey wants to eat us.
Cheers, Richard
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09 America, Staintune Pipes, K&N, Breathe, Hagon Nitros, AI & O2 removed, tune 20184 (modified), MTX-L a/f gauge
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Re: Aussie Humour
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Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 3,286 Likes: 65
Loquacious
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Loquacious
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 3,286 Likes: 65 |
Quote:
My dad was involved in the search for the body (I was only a nipper) but he caught enough to put my dad, who loved seafood, off lobster for life.
That doesn't surprise me it must not have been too pretty a site and he was family.
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Re: Aussie Humour
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Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 75
Member
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Member
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 75 |
My uncle stopped eating any seafood from Thailand and the surrounding area after the tsunami for the same reason.
Softens your hands while you do the dishes - You're soaking in it!!!!
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Re: Aussie Humour
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Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 2,419
Oil Expert
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Oil Expert
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 2,419 |
Hey Terry - great to see you back here. I hope you're doing well. Still riding? Have a great Easter mate.
Last edited by foglefar; 04/18/2014 8:19 AM.
Cheers, Richard
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09 America, Staintune Pipes, K&N, Breathe, Hagon Nitros, AI & O2 removed, tune 20184 (modified), MTX-L a/f gauge
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