Many have said it well already, your wife's feeling are what's important here. That is (or at least should be) the most important relationship in your life, after all.
So empathize with her, let her talk, and sometimes it's OK to not give voice to your opinions. I'm not saying lie about your feelings but keeping the baffles in can help. (I've had 35 years of practice with this marriage thing).

Also think about the drunk kid's family and the pain they are going through. These things have multiple victims. I'm sure if the stupid kid had known this would happen it wouldn't have. But as a former stupid kid myself I know that the thought never even occurred to her.

Contra todo mal, mezcal; contra todo bien, también