David Letterman's Top Ten List of Osama Bin Laden's final words:
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10. “My horoscope says big surprises are in store.”
9. “See, this is why I normally don’t answer the door.”
8. “The one time I give my bodyguards a day off to go to the zoo…”
7. “What on Earth could be interrupting Celebrity Apprentice?”
6. “I hear Brian Williams is on Dave to discuss my imminent demise.”
5. “At least I’ll be reunited with my dear, departed friend Jack Lalane.” (Letterman, in an aside: “Did you know they knew each other?”)
4. “I’m not sure I want to live in a world where Fast Five is the #1 movie.”
3. “Any man with multiple wives welcomes death. Am I right, fellas?”
2. “I need a house full of navy SEALs like I need a hole in the head.”
1. “Oh, crap!”
