Bonneville America Forums Forums Off Topic Discussion Forums Lounge This made me laugh

Question:

How do you tell the difference between a British Police Officer,
an Australian Police Officer and an American Police Officer?

Answer:
Pose the following question:

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children.
Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes
around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges.

You are carrying a Glock .40, and you are an expert shot.
You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?

BRITISH POLICE OFFICER'S Answer :


Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor or oppressed?

Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

Could we run away?

What does my wife think?

What about the kids?

Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?

What does the law say about this situation?

Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?

Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?

Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?

If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?

Should I call 999?

If I raise my gun and he turns and runs away, do I get blamed when he falls over, knocks his head and kills himself? .

If I shoot him, and lose the court case, does he have the opportunity to sue me, cost me my job, my credibility and the loss of my family home?


AUSTRALIAN OFFICER'S Answer:

BANG!


AMERICAN OFFICER'S Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! 'click'....

Daughter: 'Nice grouping, Dad! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips?'

One of the best I have heard in a while.

In Texas you would be arrested for not knowing the answer already.
So I will give it too ya its. BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! 'click'....reload.. BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! 'click'....
Wife: Did you hit him as many times as I did?

No sense leaving anything in the clip.
They just finished up a trial of some American cops, only substitute for the man with a knife a 92 year old woman sitting in a chair. I believe they fired 38 shots at her (they were at the wrong house) when she fired a shot from a rusty .32 after they broke down her door with no warning. While the old woman hit no one, several of the policemen injured each other. Realizing their mistake they did what they had to do, they planted drugs on her. Fortunately, they be off the streets, at least for a little while.

Not accurate....that daughter would never speak to her father and certinaly not in a positive manner.

That would be my husband and I! Too good.