Bonneville America Forums Forums Off Topic Discussion Forums Lounge You might be getting old when...

(Add to this all you want)

You sometimes find yourself humming/whistling/singing the theme for All in the Family.

You remember Dragnet.

You look in the morning obit's to see if you still have to go to work.

Your morning meds leave you too full for breakfast.

...when your dreams were wet and your farts were dry.

or your farts are wet and your dreams are dry

yeah...got that backward....

The older I get the more I keep thinking of the here-after...you know...I keep wondering what the he|| I'm here after.

I keep thinking "that used to be easy"

When the body wont keep the appointments that the brain makes!!!!!!!!!!

Don't ask me how I know.

When you try to think of ways to get her out of the mood...

When your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.

When you keep more food in the refridgerator than beer.

When you hear your favourite song in an elevator.

When older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.

When a $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer " pretty good sheet".

You like and remember the music playing in the elevator (not designed by Rich) or playing in the store.

You tune in the classical station in your work truck to help your blood pressure go down.
You tell people your at peace.(again so you can calm down).
You can remember going out on the weekend and having a great time and it only cost $40.

When what doesn't hurt, doesn't work

...when you...when you...ummmm...what was this thread about again???

You're asleep, but others worry you've died.

the spanner you were using has suddenly disappeared and you can't remember what you were doing with it

Try Bali. still works and thats with beers!

When you yell....Hey! get off my lawn!

Too soon?

When you go to bed well and wake up injured.

you leave the party at 10:00 instead of arriving

you check the daily obits for your name.

Sorry just reread. Must be getting old.............

You take more drugs than when you were a yoot...
But none of them are recreational.

when you walk into a room and cant remember what you were going there for
when watching reruns of gunsmoke makes you happy
when your listening to the Drifters and you know all the words
when you throw a party and its over by nine
you know your alive cuz it hurts everywhere
you start reading the obits to see how many of your friends are dead
when walking out to the mailbox and back is your idea of getting outside today
when you have made it to the can and didnt crappy in the pants
when you find yourself afraid to fart for fear it might not be just a fart

Your ears are hairier than your head.

You have an answer the original posted question.......

the head above your shoulders does ALL your thinking

uh...when...um, what was this thread about?

You might be getting (prematurely) old when friggin' ba.com goes down.

...Hank Williams Jr. was THE only JR. And you know his song is not a lie "HANGOVERS HURT MORE THAN THEY USED TO!"

Or All my rowdy friends have settled down---

But heck, I just try to find younger ones who I can goof off with! LOLOLOL

you sink your teeth into a steak and they stay there.

you know all the answers but nobody asks you the questions.

you are proud of your lawn mower.

A hot chick joins the band and you think...'she could be my daughter.'

Sad thing is... THIS REALLY HAPPENED!!

When your kids are better at sniffing out the bars at events than you are

You remember when the gallon counter on the gas pump went faster than the money counter. Extra points if you remember the 'ding---ding---ding' as the gallons went by and the bubble with the little propeller and the words "glass must be full before and after sale". You're positively ancient if you remember when the gas station attendant had to hand pump the gas into the big jar on top of the pump.
You recognize the names Arty Shaw, Jimmy Dorsey and Charley Spivak.

Quote:

---

You recognize the names Arty Shaw, Jimmy Dorsey and Charley Spivak

---

Who?

One day, I'll be able to add "you remember VHS and 35mm cameras" to this list
you old guys

You remember LPs you had to have a turn table for and remember having and 8 track player and a reel to reel in the house.

You remember the mechanical numbers clicking by as the gas pump went ding...ding...ding.

You remember Matchbox cars only being sold in the gas station by the register.

The gas attendant always offered to check your oil and wash your windows.

You fart dust.