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Well Ian, I gotta say over the years I've heard AND seen many o' ways a guy can get "all screwed up" at work, but that's a new one on me, dude!!!

(soooo...do ya remember this big "lug"'s name???)



Sorry , I never did, I was just a little kid I just remember the visuals....vividly. We were still hauling the logs in my grandfathers 51 Chevy pick up at the time.

I came very close to losing 2 fingers, my left pinky finger and my left middle finger 2 different times. The pinky was when I was using a scroll saw and the wood split and my hand went right into the blade breaking it and cutting it badly, still have that scar. The other was on an old jointer in my grandfathers wood shop. It was an old tool and had no guard over the blades behind the fence. I used to hook my fingers over the fence pinching the wood tightly to it to get a nice edge. Well my middle finger was hanging too low once and I took the tip off. I looked at it and it didn't bleed for a few seconds and really didn't hurt at that point because the blades were so sharp and took it off so fast. The blade went in just under the nail and cut back and down, I must have jerked back just in time since the piece of finger was still partly attached so I washed it and taped it back together with bandages like I always do when I get hurt even to this day. Doctor shmockter who needs 'em. but anyway I got lucky and there must have still been some blood flow since most of it healed back on and only a small part died that I cut away later. No infection or anything either. Did the same with my pinky, taped it to a popsickle stick. I guess it was part of growing up on the farm.

My cousin John cut his pointer finger off when we were kids oiling his bicycle chain but it was pure stupidity and he will even tell you that too. The bike was upside down so he could turn the pedals to move the chain and oil it. Well as many kids do he got it going really fast like that and then unlike most kids stuck his finger in the spokes to try and stop it.

I also got my fingers caught in my moms Sunbeam electric mixer when I was a kid. She walked away for more ingredients and I thought I would taste the batter and stuck my fingers in too far. The part that hurt the most about that one was trying to get the beaters out of the mixer to release my fingers. Every time she pushed the release it forced the beaters tighter on my fingers.

I learned all I need to know about life by killing smart people and eating their brains.
Eat right ,Exercise ,Stay fit, Die Anyway!