Tim I fully agree with your thoughts. I had testicular cancer a few years ago I went to the hospital had all the tests and it was confirmed. To say I was in deep shock is an understatement.
I went into work to advise them of what was happening and that I would be off work for a period time. My boss a woman was initialy supportive of my situation. later I found out that she was under the impression that I would be back to work before my operation and off for a couple of days !!!
I was in deep shock didnt want to talk to any body or have anthing to with any body outside my close circle of friends. I had the op then the Chemo. Ny work phoned up wanting me to visit the occupational health people. They wanted me to talk about my feelings.
I dont talk about feelings or discuss my thoughts with any body its not the way things are done on the west coast of Scotland. To be open with people is not in my nature I keep my thoughts and feelings private. I refused the invite and was told my attitude was wrong. I must admit to having what can only be determined as a "moment" I told them to get lost. I was threatened with action being taken against me for being "negative" and "uncooperative". At this point I drew a comparison with breast cancer and asked if women are treated the same way I asked them if women felt if they were less feminine because of a loss of a breast could it not be considered that a man would be equally as disturbed by the loss of a bollock. I drew comparisons between each loss. I was met with a stoney silence nobody in the room knew how to answer me. I returned to work after 6 months where people whom I considered colleagues avoided me as it was put about that I was obstructive and awkward. I will admit to never have been the easiest person to deal with and I dont suppose my manner endears me to a lot of sycophants. I work for a huge company which says a lot about its equal opportunities and care for staff. The reality is like most large corporations the main interest is the revenue generated.
The shareholder love to see all these glossy adverts and brochures as long as they do not detract from the earnings per share. Now Hp is going through another major restructuring in Europe. I am supposed to be happy and nice to all my colleagues. I am eventually going to be a victim of the cost cutting. Do I wish to be nice to people...not really. One problem I have is why do companies expect us to like our colleagues. We work beacause we have to we end up with colleagues we would never choose to be friends with in a million years. I choose my friends I have my colleagues forced upon me.
If So Tim all I can say is be honest with yourself if asked tell the truth dont sugar coat your pain for any body if they are unsympathetic to your situation then it will show you exactly what or how low companies / employees will stoop to show how "caring" they are.
One thing remains constant you can always come on here and ****** and moan away to your hearts content. This lot in here will offer support and the tear you a new one all in good fun and in a caring manner.
