Bonneville America Forums Forums Off Topic Discussion Forums Lounge Quotes

"Man who goes through turnstile sideways going to Bangkok"

He who eat plaster sheet rock.

"Most of my money was spent on Motorcycles,Women,& Whisky,
the rest I just wasted."

"98% of all Harleys ever sold are still on the road.
The other 2% made it home."

"The line of thrust must pass through both the centre of gravity AND the centre of drag, I mean it's not rocket science! Well yes, I guess it is at that."

"If some is good, more is better and too much is just right."
(Racer Brown on mixing racing fuel)

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.

Frank Sinatra

'The daughters of the high priest Anius changed whatever they pleased to corn, wine, and oil; Athalide, the daughter of Mercury, was resuscitated several times; Æsculapius resuscitated Hippolytus; Hercules rescued Alcestes from the hand of death; and Heres returned to the world after having passed fifteen days in h3ll. Romulus and Remus were the offspring of a god and a vestal virgin. The Palladium descended from heaven on the city of Troy; the hair of Berenice was changed into a constellation...give me the name of one people among whom incredible prodigies have not been performed, and especially in those periods in which the people scarcely knew how to write or read'.



Voltaire, 'Miracles and Idolatry'

guns dont kill peopls, husbands who come home early do...

"Religion is the opiate of the masses" - Karl Marx

"Say the secret word and the rubber duck comes down"- Grocho Marx

"guns don't kill ppl. hydraulic shock,inertia & kenetic energy does."
Yota

"Wow Mert...You used guns & farts in the same sentence. I knew I rubbed off on you. "
Yota

"keep a close eye on your condoms. having one come off or finding out you have a hole in one can mess up a great ride. "
Yota

"If you have a stomach virus that caused you to have the squirts for a really long time DO NOT mistakingly use a Stridex pad thinking it is a Tucks pad"
Yota

Happy belated Birthday JR!

Sage advice there moe thanks for sharring the "Wisdom of the Yota".

Here are a couple of J.R.R. Tolkien quotes that I like...

“Not all who wander are lost”
“It is the job that is never started that takes longest to finish.”

"How would I define happiness?...Good food, good wine and a good woman...or a bad woman, depends on how much happiness you can handle"

"My good girl treats me better my bad girl treats me good"

M M Mell Tillis

You kill bugs good, man!

-Starship Troopers

"You miss 100% of the shots you don't take."

-Larry Bird (i think)

Despite the cost of living, people continue to do it.

my wife asked me if i could take out the trash, my reply, "sometimes"

Albert Einstein:
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler".

Me:
"If nothing can go wrong, it will anyway."

"I was going faster than I ever went in my whole life, then I fell off." Little Fause

Bang on the money guy said:

Quote:

---

<distopia> whats the word for that ringing in your ears?

<distopia> begins with T

<overh3at> The Wife

---

"It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool , than to open your mouth and remove all doubt." Mark Twain

Denial aint just a river in Eygpt - Mark Twain

"Never rub another man's rhubarb!" The Joker

"...little cannibal urchins, the priest's children, who had stolen them to play marbles with. Thus we see how that the spine of even the hugest of living things tapers off at last into simple child's play."

- Crewmembers of the Pequod describing the use made of a bleached whale skeleton washed ashore in the novel Moby Dick by Herman Melville.

'My friends, we live in the greatest nation in the history of the world. I hope you'll join with me as we try to change it.'

- Barack Hussein Obama

"That's what they all say."

- Various

"For the first time in my adult lifetime, I’m really proud of my country." Michelle Obama

"I did not play the sax for that woman!"
-William Jefferson Clinton

(okay...I MAY not have gotten that quote "exactly right" there)

"Some people are like Slinkies. They have no practical use whatsoever, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs."

Quotes from work:

"What part of "NO" don't you understand?"

"I'm 63 years old. I've felt every kind of pain there is and I've decided I don't like it.."

"You want it fixed? We'll fix it. You don't want it fixed? We won't fix it. Fixin' it costs money. Make up your mind 'cause there's other people waiting for us to fix their stuff."

"There's a lot of sadness in the world, seems it's your turn."

"If the shoe fits,Buy it"...Imelda Marcos

A little OT, but often very entertaining

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/

My personal favorite from Genghis Khan 1226:

"The greatest happiness is to vanquish your enemy,
To chase him before you,
To see his cities reduced to dust,
To rid him of his wealth,
To see those dear to him bathed in tears,
To clasp to your bosom his wives and daughters.