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You forgot the most important one. Selective hearing.
When a woman starts to blather on the usual response is " I'm sorry where you talking to me."



Mine is usually "What? I can't hear a word you are saying" Trouble is working around machinery and loud bikes and cars my whole life it is sometimes true!

I learned all I need to know about life by killing smart people and eating their brains.
Eat right ,Exercise ,Stay fit, Die Anyway!