Bonneville America Forums Forums Off Topic Discussion Forums Lounge Chemestry 101 new Element Found

To All,
This should explain a lot. Enjoy!

Subject: Chemestry - GOV1

Recent hurricanes and gasoline issues are proof of the existence of a new chemical element. Research has led to the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science.

The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second to take from four days to four years to complete.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2-6 years; It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's Mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.

When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.

Trumpy

Trumpy, I think this is absolutely HILARIOUS!!!

(but I gotta warn ya dude, there are certain "elements" within the "nucleus" of the BA.com Administration 'round here who's command of "Comic Chemistry" is a bit suspect, and thus they MAY put the finishing "period-[ic]" to this thread of your's, post haste...unfortunately)


(and in their defense...you never know who this might rile up and be a "catalyst" for them to get on their soapbox, ya know)

Noe THATS funny. I printing this out to share!

Well Rich...you better get to that RIGHT AWAY then, dude!

I have the feeling this one's gonna be "vaporized" REAL QUICK!!!

(hey...isn't it called "sublimation" when a substance goes directly from a solid to a gaseous state, bypassing the liquid state???)

This is found world wide as well.I think,in fact, this probably one of the most abundant elements in the world,probably wasn't detected before because morons are invisible to other morons.

That's awesome

Dwight,
I knew beyond a shadow of doubt I would recieve some much needed attention and guidance. But, I must admit feel pretty dang good amongst the morons! Ha ha ha

Trumpy

".....forming isodopes...."- working in state government, I can say this is truer than you know.

It's still here.
Excellent.

I copied it to send to my son. A chemistry major.