Tom,
I am so very sorry for your loss. May God be with you and your family through this terribly difficult time in your life. I can some what imagine the pain you must feel because I too lost my wife of 37 years in 2004. I felt that emptyness and unfairness too and went through a host of emotions.... You are in prayers. Feel free to PM me if you need someone else to talk to.
Bob Scrutchfield
