Bonneville America Forums Forums Off Topic Discussion Forums Lounge Your best drunken "hey watch this" moment

and...well...case in point

Not to worry. I have had several experiences with LSD in my past that included a now Marine Corps F-18 driver. Then, we called him "dude". Now we call him "Lt. Colonel". His employees call him "Sir" or "Boss" or "Muddy". Naturally, the name his Mother gave him will remain confidential. Pretty sure he is clean now.

Good Paula! Now when the Ringling Bros come a callin', we can tell 'em that that part of your life is over forever, so they won't be in suspense anymore!

Hey! Come to think of it, I've got big feet(and no job anymore)! What size IS that outfit o' yours, anyway?

(yeeeaaah, I KNOW...I don't NEED the clown suit, riiiiiiiight?!)

Now, you know those Disney "cast members" aren't allowed to say a word to the public, don't cha Paula?!

In your case, after reading your very funny words all these past months, I think that would be a total waste of talent!

I don't care what they're offering you. Don't sign that contract!

OK, New Years Eve 1985, the wife and I had a bunch of friends over the house. Everyones drinking and eating and having a great time. It's getting close to midnight so I pop open a bottle of Champagne and poor everyone a glass to toast in the new year. The ball drops and it's Happy New Years. I still had the bottle of Champagne in my hand and after I kiss the wife I decide to whip back the bottle of bubbly. Well let me tell you, that is the wrong thing to do. Once I put that bottle to my lips and whipped my head back I realized I was in trouble. Basically the champagne shot out my nose, mouth and I think even my ears. I ended up inhaling half the freaking bottle. The other half was all over everyone in living room. To this day my brother Rick reminds me of this brain cramp and says the look on my face the moment before the explosion was priceless.

well there have been far to many to list here but it has been a very long time since any thoughts like that have entered the matter between the ears here. i was 16 and knew all about how to ride a motorcycle, (hahahahahaha yeah right) was at an outside concert at a place where there was many activities (horseback rideing, swimming, lotsa stuff to do) there was this big hill over there behind the bandstand that we used to ride over and get air. well. i had had a few to many cans of stupid with some of that southern bourbon mixed in and said to my friends (yeah right, friends hahahaha if they were friends they would have stopped me hahaha) i am gonna get on my bike and jump the hill, well away i went and boy oh boy did i get some air. they said i went higher then they had ever seen any of us go and when i landed i was at the bottom of the hill (usually we would get, at max, about halfway down the hill and land) but i was at the bottom and landed, i broke the frame of that bike where the backbone Y's off to the shocks and i went @$$ over teakettle untill i came to a stop (they said i looked like Kenevil at ceasers) and when i woke up all my friends (there's is that word again)were around, the music had stopped, and they (the people in charge) wanted to take me the hospital. of course i said no and insisted i was ok. my friends (hahahahaha) were all laughing and thought it was cool. for a few yrs i was king of the hill. to this day if i see anybody that was there, we have to laugh about the broken bike. i remember being in the air thinkin "i think i have gone to far, i should be landing, where the he!! is the groun"....thud. i think that is when my back trouble started hahahahahahaha