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Pam (but please don't tell my wife)
When I worked on the place in Utah, there was a Hereford cow that lost her calf. We hand milked her to provide milk for other orphaned calves. Bill, the herd manager named her Heidie. One evening Heidie kicked the nearly full can over and Bill launched into a semi-controlled rant chewing Heidie out for her poor form. Little did we know, but the real Heidie and ranch owner's wife was standing just outside the shed. She kinda' smiled, although that may have been my imagination. I made myself very small, barely noticeable. 
We won't tell your wife Jack, secret's safe here 
jh
"It's not what I say that's important, it's what you hear" Red Auerbach
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