 Home Remedies
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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 2,968 Likes: 1
Loquacious
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OP
Loquacious
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 2,968 Likes: 1 |
1. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of boiling
water down your throat and, presto, the blockage will be removed.
2. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone
else to hold them while you chop away.
3. Avoid arguments with your wife about lifting the toilet seat by simply using
the sink.
4. For high-blood-pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few
minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.
5. A mousetrap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling
over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.
6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be
afraid to cough.
7. Have a bad toothache? Smash your thumb with a hammer and you will forget all
about the toothache.
8. Sometimes, we just need to remember what the rules of life really are: You
only need two tools - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use
the WD-40; if it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.
9. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them. So be brief with
people.
10. Never pass up an opportunity to go to the bathroom.
Thoughts for the day:
If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You get another chance.
Be really nice to your family and friends; you never know when you might need
them to empty your bedpan.
Some people are like "slinkies". They're not really good for anything; but they
still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs.
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 Re: Home Remedies
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Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 2,623 Likes: 2
Loquacious
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Loquacious
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 2,623 Likes: 2 |
Thanks for the laugh! 
Kevin - Luceo Non Uro
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Re: Home Remedies
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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 760
3/4 Throttle
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3/4 Throttle
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 760 |
Thanks I needed that this morning Dave
04 SpeedMaster, Windvest Screen, Leatherworks Bags.
F&AM, WM 3 times
Rifle & Pistol Competitor
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Re: Home Remedies
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Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 45
Greenhorn
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Greenhorn
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 45 |
Rolled right out of my chair over #6!
Skip
Red/Black 03 Speedmaster
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Re: Home Remedies
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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 1,138
Learned Hand
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Learned Hand
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 1,138 |
John 06 America Mulberry\Silver
"Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time"
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Re: Home Remedies
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 3,012
Loquacious
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Loquacious
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 3,012 |
Quote:
1. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of boiling
water down your throat and, presto, the blockage will be removed.
where is the remedy for the throat burn? oooh wait, i know. swallow another ice cube  .
allhailthefrenchpress
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