Happily Married Biker
Badass Biker Bob wakes up at home with a huge hangover.
He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he
sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side
table.
He sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and
pressed. Bob looks around the room and sees that it is in
perfect order, spotless, clean. So is the rest of the house.
He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table:
"Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping.
Love you."
So he goes to the kitchen, and sure enough there is a hot
breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the
table, eating.
Bob asks, "Son, what happened last night?"
His son says, "Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and
delirious, broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and
gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door."
Confused, Badass Bob asks, "So, why is everything in order
and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?"
His son replies, "Oh, that! Mom dragged you to the bedroom,
and when she tried to take your pants off, you said, "Lady,
leave me alone, I'M MARRIED !!!!!!
Biker Meets Viagra
Crash, the Biker, walks into a pharmacy & says to the
pharmacist, "Listen, I have three biker babes coming over
tonight. I've never had three biker babes at once, & I need
something to keep me horny, keep me potent."
The pharmacist reaches under the counter, unlocks the bottom
drawer & takes out a small cardboard box marked with a label
"Viagra Extra Strength" & says, "Here, if you eat this, you'll go
NUTS for 12 hours!"
The next day, Crash rides down to the same pharmacy, walks
right up to the same pharmacist & pulls down his pants.
The pharmacist looks in horror as he notices that Crash's
Johnson is black & blue with the skin hanging off in some places.
Crash says, "Gimme a bottle of Ben Gay."
The pharmacist replies, "BEN GAY?! You're not going to put Ben
Gay on your d*ck while it's in that condition?"
Crash says, "No, it's for my arms, the girls didn't show up."
Hope you like.....Spud
