Finally, an analogy that will properly explain a guy's point of
view to a woman....at a price.
A boyfriend and girlfriend are getting into bed. The passion
starts to heat up when she says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."
The guy says, "What? What's this?"
She responds with that phrase we don't want to hear:
"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough
for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.
Can't you just love me for who I am and not for what I do for you in the bedroom?"
Realizing nothing was going to happen that night,
the guy rolls over and goes to sleep.
He takes the next day off work to spend with her, and takes
her shopping at a big, expensive department store.
She tries on several expensive outfits but can't decide on which
one. He says, "Let's just get them all." She then wants new
shoes to go with the new clothes and he says, "Why don't we
get a pair for each outfit." They then go to the jewelry
department and she picks out some diamond earrings. Further
testing him, she chooses a tennis bracelet, even though he
knows she doesn't play tennis. At last she says
"I think this is everything honey, let's go to the cashier."
He can hardly contain himself as he says,
"No baby, I don't feel like it."
Her face goes blank, jaw drops open as she says, "WHAT?"
He explains to her: "Baby I just want you to HOLD this stuff
for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs
as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."
If looks could kill, he'd be lying on the floor, but he has
one more salvo to fire.
"Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"
He didn't get lucky that night either, but at least she knew she'd been outsmarted.
WARNING!!! Note the character is a boyfriend.
Any husband who tries this will thereafter refer to the
woman in question as "My First Wife".
