Bonneville America Forums Forums Off Topic Discussion Forums Lounge Foxworthy?

Isn't this Jeff Foxworthy character from Georgia or Alabama or something like that? Anyhow he must have jumped into a wood panelled station-wagon and visited Jellystone & Two-Dot, buying huckleberry chocolates with notepad in hand . I think he's actually referring to North Dakota .

Speaking of southern humor, I saw where childhood hero Junior Samples is buried in Cumming, GA. Chy, that ought to maybe be a tour stop
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Jeff Foxworthy's comments on Montana

If parking your car for the night involves an extension cord, You might live In Montana

If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 8 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by,
You might live in Montana.

If you're proud that your state makes the national news primarily because it houses the coldest spot in the nation, You might live in Montana.

If you have ever refused to buy something because it's "too spendy", You might live in Montana

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March, You might Live in Montana.

If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work there, You might live in Montana.

If you measure distance in hours, You might live in Montana.

If you know several people who have hit deer more than once, You might live in Montana.

If you often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back again, You might live in Montana.

If you've installed security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked, You might live in Montana.

If the largest traffic jam in your town centers around a high school Basketball game, You might live in Montana.

If you carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use them, You might live in Montana.

If there are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at Wal-Mart at any given time, You might live in Montana.

If there are more people at work on Christmas Eve Day than on Deer gun opener, You might live in Montana.

If you consider Red Lodge exotic, You might live in Montana.

If your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to your Cottonwood, You might live in Montana.

If the sunbelt to you means Miles City, You might live in Montana.

If a brat is something you eat, You might live in Montana.

If finding your misplaced car keys involves looking in the ignition, You might live in Montana.

If you find 0 degrees a little chilly, You might live in Montana.

If you actually understand these observations, and you forward them to all your Montana friends, You must live in Montana

the ones about Minnesota are actually pretty true...and funny:
If you consider it a sport to get food by drilling through 18 inches of ice and sitting there for days hoping that the food will swim by,
You might live in Minnesota.

If you're proud your state makes the national news 196 nights each year because International Falls is the coldest spot in the nation,
You might live in Minnesota.

If you don't know the difference between 'borrow' and 'loan',
You might live in Minnesota.

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through June,
You might live in Minnesota.

If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work there,
You might live in Minnesota.

If your dad sleeps in his baseball hat, You might live in Minnesota.

If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time,
You might live in Minnesota.

If you know how to say...Wayzata...Mahtomedi....Cloquet.... Edina...and Shakopee,
You might live in Minnesota.

If you think that ketchup is a little too spicy,
You might live in Minnesota.

You measure distance in hours,
You might live in Minnesota.

You switch from "Heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back again,
You might live in Minnesota.

You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow in a blizzard without flinching,
You might live in Minnesota.

You see people wearing hunting clothes to church,
You might live in Minnesota.

You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked,
You might live in Minnesota.

You think the 2 major food groups are fish, and deer meat,
You might live in Minnesota.

You carry jumper cables in your car, and your girlfriend knows how to use them,
You might live in Minnesota.

There are always 17 empty cars running in the parking lot at Mill's Fleet Farm ,
You might live in Minnesota.

You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit,
You might live in Minnesota.

Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow,
You might live in Minnesota.

You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter, and of course, road construction,
You might live in Minnesota.

If "Down South" to you means Iowa,
You might live in Minnesota.

You find minus 10 degrees "a little chilly",
You might live in Minnesota.

If you actually understand these jokes, you probably live in Minnesota or Iowa.

Quote:

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You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter, and of course, road construction,
You might live in Minnesota.

You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit,
You might live in Minnesota.

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John, You might be right! What say we be on the look out for this Foxworthy guy saying somethin' along the lines of...."You live in the second largest media market in the whole country and you have NO PROFESSION FOOTBALL TEAM, then you live in Montana!"

Once he says THAT I'll be thinking that boy's sense of geography is WAY WAY OFF!!!

(or as you infer, the dude's gone GENERIC on us!!!)

My friend just called me this morning and told me I'm a redneck because I have a refrigerator in my front lawn.(old one I took out last night that died) There is a couch on my front porch right behind it and since I run a towing co. I can cut my grass and find several cars!

ya'll want to see rednecks????? come to mississippi!!!! i can say this 'cause i've been here 60+ years,,, and moved back into the country. yeah,, them 'necks are alive and well[me too] in ms. actually, they're the salt of the earth,,,kinda clannish still,,,hey,,,ther'e my neighbors.[across the creek, and woods]

I was raised out in the middle of nowhere SC. Little town called Jedburg. Untill i was 12 we had to drive 10 miles to get to a little tiny store called "speels grocery". mr Spell still gets up every morning and makes sandwiches for people who come by for lunch. Kind of place you can buy a glass bottle of Coke, pull up a chair and talk..

Sad part is Jedburg still does not have a traffice light. We did get a flashing light tho. But where else can you walk out the front door in your underwear at noon and no one sees you?

I live in what i call "the city" now. I hate it, houses too close together, people wanting to stop by and say hi, I really dont like Humans anymore lol

If your "girlfriend" has a natural woolen coat, and four hooves, you might live in NZ

If your "new" car is a 1985 Aussie made Holden, you might live in NZ

If all your relatives have already emigrated, leaving you the only family member remaining, you might live in NZ

If your National Sporting team, at ANY sport has never won, you might live in NZ

If you speak in an accent that no-one else in the world can understand, you might live in NZ

If you Prime Minister is a bloke with a decidedly feminine name, you might live in NZ

If you only major tourist attraction is a bubbling mud pool, that smells like a rotting corpse, you might live in NZ

If your National Emblem went from an uninteresting, flightless bird, to what resembles a dead, white twig, on a black background, you might live in NZ